Cutting the cord is tough.

It's my work BFF's last day tomorrow. This saddens me.

Yes, he was an intern in the same position for 15 months. Yes, he is a 33-year-old man with a master's degree. Yes, he is way too good for this job. No, he didn't even like his job anyway.

But who's going to have lunch with me now?

Nothing I could have done would have commemorated him with the respect and effort he really deserves, but I tried hard. I made him an 11 minute audio documentary, forcing everyone who has ever talked to him sing his praises. And sing they did. They sang like golden angels fluttering up to intern heaven.

If you would like to share this special moment with us, and laugh your patooty off in the process, please do enjoy.

Srinitastic.wav

I daresay this is the finest bit of work I have done, or really anyone has ever done, since, well, ever. To download, click "download now", wait exactly 40 seconds, then click "download" again and you will see why he will be missed! I can't believe he's leaving, and you won't be able to either. It's a sad, sad day.

**Note: special guest appearances from Barack Obama and Ira Glass.